R.A.P. (Rants with Ants in Pants) 1 - I need a new alarm clock

I need a new alarm clock, but you cannot give it to me cos it's so suay to give me clock they say, so I need to buy a new alarm clock.
I need a new alarm clock because now, I cannot wake up in the morning in time because the alarm clock i have now is not strong enough, it's like japanese coffee, too weak, no kick, and then at night i don't have enough sleep becuase i don't like to sleep early, then like i get so frustrated because i cannot finish my work, then i know that i cannot wake up early tomororw to do because my alarm clock now is too no kick and then i get so frustrated and i have no time and no mood and when i got no mood i don't want to work but i just want to sleep and then i cannot sleep becuase i cannot finish my work and i dont' sleep becuase i can't finish my work the ni cannot wake up tomorrow because my no kcik clock cannot wake me up and i ge tso pissed off like that being so trapped in this stupidity and lack of sleep meanscannot drive emans waste time, means waste everythin meands feel stupid and means get misundertstood means so blur and so impossible.
I NEED A NEW ALARM CLOCK. I DON'T EVEN LIKE TO WAKE UP EARLY. I DON'T EVEN LIKE TO SLEEP EARLY. I DON'T EVEN LIKE IT. but i need a new alarm clock. and i need the money to buy it. which i don't have. so i want to go crazy again. because it's a nest of things i don't want to do. because it's so stupid.

If I were a snail, I could just sleep and wake up in my slimey house to eat on anything green and leave a trail of shit without getting out of the house you know, and sleep whenever i want to and eat and sleep and so on, mate occasionally, or whatever is it that i would do, eggs or whatever, and die from falling off a tree or drinking too much coffee or whatever.
If I were a snail, I would not need a new alarm clock. I don't even like snails.

I NEED A NEW ALARM CLOCK because I am not a snail.

Ah Wen

Ah Wen is a lighter thief. Ah Wen steals lighters. She got a few expensive ones in her collection, but she stopped stealing those because she feels bad about stealing those. Nowadays, she pretty much sticks to stealing disposable lighters. She likes them more than anything else. She likes it when she finds a new design, or a new colour, of something so familiar to her. She likes to use her stolen lighters as she wonders how the previous owner used it - mostly for cigarettes, she guesses, but possibly sometimes for flaming drinks or cakes or other things in her imagination. So, of course, Ah Wen doesn't take them from over the counter, because they are new and they are not yet special. Yes, she even takes them from her friends, who sometimes steal lighters for her. Ah Wen has too many lighters to count, so she does not bother to. She is sometimes afraid that her room will explode. She is sometimes afraid that the police will take her away. She is most times unhappy.

An informal piece of Bukit Timah Road nostalgia

It's quite something to be along Bukit Timah Road around evening time. The students never grow old. They look quite the same as we once did. And they remind us perfectly of who we used to know. Their distinctive after-school-smell... The way they chatter with their friends... Or the way they look into space so seriously.
I no longer remember what fills the mind of a student on his/her solitary way home. Something they said in class? An argument waiting at home? That special "meimei" or boy?
I can really only imagine like an outsider. Scary. It's like I haven't been there before!

Still, I wish to tell them that it's probably not important at all. That they should forget about everything completely, and enjoy the unspoken, yet unanimously acknowledged, rights to be irresponsible that belong to teenagers.
I wish somebody had told me...though I probably wouldn't have believed.
Oh well...

Oh well, I want to go into the schools though. I want to see to remember how it was like, before I become too far away, too old, and forgotten by myself. I want to sit where I used to sit, and remember who I used to laugh with, and what I used to eat every Friday, and how I psyched myself up to fake a fever.
I want to hide where I used to hide, and listen to the echoes of the whispers I used to whisper, to remember who I used to whisper to.
I want to watch where I used to watch, and imagine that that ageless faceless student over there is you, or anybody, and wonder how everything could have been different.
I want to go where you used to go and imagine how you used to go there and what you used to do and wonder how everything could have been different and how you felt and what was on your mind.
I want to eat what you used to eat I want to laugh at what you used to laugh at and imagine how it might have been if we might have been able to laugh at it together.
Not because I love you, but because I might have.
Not because I love you, but because of the past we have lived, and might have shared.

(For Junyao, though not about Junyao, to convince him of something secretive.)

Challenge

Smile, in a nice way,
at three strangers on a day
you feel quite okay.

(July - August Theme Song)

"this is pointless,
it can't be helped,
in this wonderful world,
we are just living our lives."

Jump on the spot.

Jump on the spot twice
and probably nothing much will happen except that you
jumped on the spot twice.

4 am

I must sleep too late
but I hear the insects' song
that is deafening.

(an old piece and old other things)
(sneak)

Ice Cream Sundae

I did not enjoy the peach coloured, peach flavored ice cream.

I took two tip-of-the-spoon-ful-s of it and everyone's paper umbrellas to play with them until it was time to leave.

I chose and took two paper umbrellas with me. One green, painted with morning glory. The other yellow, painted with another flower

I don't remember because I broke it and threw it away on the way home.

Now, I am not as happy as I could be.

想你 3

昨晚，我这儿下着大雨。
昨晚，我梦见了你。
今早醒来的我想着昨晚的你在哪里、
当我在梦见你的时候，你梦见了谁？

The Scream Monster Report

Name: Scream Monster, The. A.k.a. Scream Queen, The. A.k.a."Aahhhhh!" (As in, the screaming itself.)
Sex: Female.
Age: Very, very old.
Place of origin: Some say Lake Vostok. Others doubt.
Physical Attributes: Petite, invisible to most eyes, beautiful.
Other Attributes: Solitary, secretive, neither kind nor unkind but capable of both.
Basic description: The Scream Monster farms screams commercially. She sows the different scream seeds into you, nurtures their growth, harvests them, and then sells them off. The Scream Monster has a lot of partners who are involved with the production process and different partners are involved with different screams. The partners are compensated with different amount of screams proportionate to how much their screams are worth. It is a very profitable business. She is a very important lady as screams are very important materials or ingredients for very important things. She is therefore more commonly referred to as the Scream Queen. Apparently, screams also make great snacks sometimes.
Common types of screams:
Each type of screams are classified into about 5 different grades, ranging from the best which comprises of the truest screams, to the poorest, which comprises of the falsest screams. The best screams are most valuable; the poorest are not so valuable. Presented below are brief introduction of 4 major screams.
1) The dream screams (DS): Rare, involves unspeakable partners who partake in the process with unspeakable grace. In their purest form, dream screams are very powerful and can repel both goodness and evil. The secret beings are known to wear them as a pendant of sort to protect themselves, for example, on uncertain journeys. Only powerful beings can withstand the force of the dream screams though. It is said that the Scream Queen herself wears a necklace and a cloak made of dream screams.
2) The fear screams (FS): Common, and important. The fear screams are jointly produced with the Panic Kingdom. The truest and most powerful fear screams used to come from the Panic King himself, but now, those are rare as he usually lets his Queen tend to most of the production. The other members from the Panic Kingdom take part in the production themselves, producing fear screams of different grades and quantity. The lower grade fear screams are common ingredients in secret food.
3) The delight screams (DeS): Less common than FS, more delicious. The delight screams are jointly produced with the elusive Joylets. It is well known that the lower grades of delight screams are suckled upon by beings of all origins like our lollipop. The best delight screams are extremely and profoundly powerful and valuable, although it seems that few know of its proper use. Delight screams are usually cultivated in children, although adult delight screams are known to be more powerful.
4) The boredom screams (BS): Somewhat common and important raw material in the secret world. They are jointly produced with the Bore Monster. The boredom screams are touted to be tough, and flexible, they make great clothing, and are most associated with invisibility cloaks.
In case of screaming:
1) If you feel a scream coming, scream as naturally as possible.
2) Pretend you don't know about the secrets of screams, scream and forget.
In case of meeting the Scream Monster:
1) Pretend you don’t know about the Scream Monster.
2) Scream if you have to, then pretend to be puzzled.
3) Run away.
4) I can’t exactly tell you how, but DO NOT OFFEND HER.
But don’t worry too much as the chances of meeting her are quite slim.


Pssst FAQ:
1) If we’re supposed to pretend that we don’t know anything, why publish the secret report at all?
A) It’s one of those matrix (the movies) things, you know, getting closest to the truth as possible, for the sake of it.