The Shit King Report

Name: Shit King, The. A.k.a. Ken, A.k.a. Shit Prince, The.
Sex: Male.
Age: Unknown.
Place of Origin: Asia, or the Tropics, or Asian Tropics.
Physical Attributes: Shapeshifter, but usually appears as a tall, fair, skinny, Chinese.
Other Attributes: Reportedly very "down to earth" despite illustrious career, odd-tempered.
Basic description: Ken, as he is better known as, controls your whims to shit. It is understood that he harvest the thoughts of wanting to shit. These thoughts are valuable for trading as they are usually very intense, focused and self absorbed. It is also understood that he harvests the shit eventually although it is unsure what he does with them.
His primary responsibilities are to maintain the shit balance of the world, i.e. the breaking down, the production of shit, and so on. He is a therefore a severely important figure, for the amount of shit in the world has to be delicately maintained. (Just imagine the dire consequences of his mismanagement.)
Important Affliations:
1) Time. The Shit King has a mysterious relationship with time (as all Secret Monster Kings/Queens do, but the Shit King's is regarded as very special). It is such that a legend exists amongs the secret kingdoms that the Shit King and Time have an ageless pact. This effect/pact is the reason why 1) Time crawls when one needs to shit but not yet have the suitable facilities. 2) Time feels both fast and slow, or neither fast nor slow, for the shitter when he shits. In other words, when one is shitting, he is much removed of the sense of time passing.
2) Panic Kingdom. Another notable affliation is that the Shit King is good friends with the Panic King. Some reports that they were once brothers, but the evidences are lost to time, so nobody knows for sure anymore. However, it is well understood that the Shit King and the Panic King are very close, and that probably accounts for why one feels like shitting when they panic.
3) Flies. Being very secretive creatures, it is relatively unknown still what they really do other than being spies, and occasionally instigating diarrhoea. (There is however, an interesting history regarding how Flies came to join the Shit King. Approval to publish is still pending.)
4) Birds. Birds are loyal subjects to the Shit King.
In case of meeting the Shit King:
1) You will probably want to shit.
2) Go shit.
Possible repercussions of pissing off the Shit King: Bowel discomfort of any of the many sorts.